


grizzam's playlist

by malachailatte



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, It happens, M/M, as the title suggests, bc they'll pop up, i'll be adding characters, lots of pining, this is based on my grizzam playlist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 10:52:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19294249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malachailatte/pseuds/malachailatte
Summary: this is based on my spotify grizzam playlist, a oneshot per song (link to the playlist itself, fics go in order: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/44KLS1A7HB6lfi4IBBM5sq)---this is a collection of grizzam oneshots with a lot of fluff, angst, pining and emotion. i've warned you.





	grizzam's playlist

**Author's Note:**

> oh god, i miss you too  
> it's all i ever do  
> i'm coming back to you  
> and i won't let go
> 
> \---
> 
> the expedition group has been gone for two weeks now, and with everything happening in new ham, sam is starting to lose his mind without grizz.

It had been two weeks. The expedition crew wasn’t back yet and Sam was being to lose himself.

It wasn’t like he didn’t have things to occupy himself with. Eden was only a few days old and he was helping Becca to take care of her, along with Kelly and Gordie. New Ham was in disarray since the arrest of Allie and Will, lead by a triumphant Campbell. It was chaos.

And Sam’s mind kept going back to Grizz.

It was so stupid. Thinking only about Grizz when there were others out there on the expedition, people like Bean and Gwen, risking their lives to keep the rest of them safe. With so much going on, his thoughts felt… selfish. And yet they wouldn’t stop. The heart wants what it wants, right?

God, that literature-loving, beautifully smart and wonderfully naive boy with a heart of gold. His mind kept going back to the thought of Grizz’s lips on his and his hand on the other boy’s chest, so vivid it was like he was right there. Sam couldn’t know if Grizz was thinking of him. All he knew was that he kept getting distracted from his daily duties by these memories and he didn’t know if it was keeping him going or tearing him apart.

He said, “I’ll see you soon”, right?

He  _ had  _ to be thinking of Sam in some way.

“Sam?”

Becca tapping him on the shoulder brought him back to reality.

“Hi. Yeah. Sorry, I keep zoning out,” he signed, an apologetic look on his face.

Becca shook her head but she seemed concerned. “It’s okay. You’re just… you seem constantly uneasy now. Like you’re waiting for something to sneak up on you.”

“Yeah, well, having Campbell as the man behind our two new mayors will do that to you,” he replied, a weak joke in the circumstances but the best he could do without outright admitting he was pining. And plus… having Campbell, his psychopathic, abusive older brother, in power wasn’t exactly doing much for his health.

“Alright, touché.” Becca held her hands up in mock surrender. 

Suddenly, a cry came from behind them, from Eden. She didn’t often cry, much less than the two were expecting, but when she did, she  _ howled _ . The little one had lungs on her.

“Oh, no, sweetie.” Becca rushed to the cradle (‘borrowed’ from the hospital) and picked Eden up, rocking her gently to and fro.

Sam came over too, waving to little baby Eden. “Hi, little cutie. What are you crying over, hmm?”  _ She’s got the right idea, _ he thought.  _ There’s a lot to cry over. _

Eden hiccuped and quieted, reaching her hands up at Sam with grabbing motions. She liked Sam, which was good for Becca when she needed to sleep for a while. Her hand looked comically tiny next to his.

In all the fear, exhaustion and stress, Eden was a silver lining.

“The expedition group will be fine, y’know.”

“Hmm?”

“The expedition group.” As Becca repeated her words, only able to say them aloud due to having Eden in her arms, Sam felt his heart drop. Had she figured it out? Did she know he was in love with Grizz? Had she guessed they had slept together on Thanksgiving when neither of them showed up to the dinner, and knew they had kissed goodbye before the expedition?

Wait. How would she know that?

She didn’t. Hopefully. She already knew he was gay, of course she did, but he didn’t want to out Grizz like that. Who he told and when was his concern only.

Sam tried to brush it off. “I’m not bothered about the expedition group. I know they’ll be fine.”

Becca stopped tickling under Eden’s chin to give Sam a pointed glance. “It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that you get squirmy whenever anyone mentions the vague possibility that they're lost out there. And they're our friends. You're allowed to worry, but they're gonna be okay.”

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Or Sam would guess as much, as Becca’s head jerked in that direction and she headed towards it, flinging the door open with one hand with Eden balanced on her other arm. He followed her to find that Kelly was there, looking disheveled and exhausted yet more joyous than Sam had seen anyone be in weeks.

“Kelly, what is it?”

“Expedition group. They’re back. They’re okay and they found land,” Kelly panted.

_ They found land,  _ thought Sam.  _ We’re going to survive this. _

Then another thought crossed his mind.

_ Grizz is back. _

“Where are they?” Becca asked, her face lit up.

“They’re at the church, come on!” Kelly gestured wildly and turned, heading back in the direction of the church, and Becca and Sam barely had time to grab jackets and wrap Eden in her blanket before hurriedly following her.

The church was filled with loud, babbling voices and an atmosphere of excitable urgency as Kelly, Becca and Sam arrived. The same fear and animosity from earlier still lingered with Allie and Will cuffed near the front, secured by Clark, Jason and Luke, but that felt almost little in comparison to the news.

Sam could see Bean, and Gwen, and everyone else from the expedition…

...but not Grizz.

_ Where’s Grizz? _

Sam tapped Kelly on the shoulder. “Where’s Grizz?”

“I think he went outside. Like us, he wasn’t happy with what’s happened while they’ve been gone and didn’t want to spend more time in here than was necessary.” She smiled apologetically and whispered something to Becca, cooing at Eden as she did.

Sam didn’t wait another second, racing outside into the cold. Grizz wasn’t in sight when he got out there and Kelly had left no indication as to where he might go. So Sam went to the first place that came to mind. The forest. The place where the two of them had said goodbye. It was quiet there, nobody to disturb or ask unwanted questions. It’s where Sam would go.

The forest wasn’t far away, not when New Ham was a small town. And as soon as Sam reached the clearing where Grizz had said his farewell, the memories came flooding back.

_ “I’m sorry I come with strings attached. But I need you to know that what we had was real.” _

Sam remembered how Grizz hadn’t pushed him away when he kissed him, but kissed him back instead.

_ “I’ll see you soon.” _

He had felt an ache in his heart he’d never felt before when Grizz had signed that for him, meaning he had  _ learnt _ it for him.

Sam couldn’t lose Grizz. Not when he was the only person, besides Becca, who deliberately tried for him.  _ “I wanted to speak to you in your language,”  _ he said, and despite how he had mixed up ASL and BSL (Grizz’s mistake would always make Sam smile), he had  _ tried for him _ .

“Sam?”

He wouldn’t have heard the voice behind him anyway but he was too caught up in his emotions to sense the presence of someone there.

Then the person tapped him gently on the shoulder, and he turned around to see Grizz.

“Grizz?” He asked softly, barely raising his hands because he knew if he did, he would grab Grizz and never let go.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s me.” Grizz slowly came over to him, a small and soft smile playing on his lips. God, he looked good. Kinda dirty and his hair was still windswept and messy from being outdoors for so long, sure, but after the few weeks Sam had spent without him, Gareth Visser was a sight for sore eyes.

_ He came to see me. He could’ve just walked away but he came to see me.  _

_ He was thinking about me. _

Sam reached for Grizz’s hand, feeling a rush of relief as the other boy entwined their fingers together. Partially signing with his other hand, he said, “I thought you weren’t thinking about me. That… when you came back, you would’ve changed your mind. About us and everything that had happened and-”

Grizz let go of Sam’s hand. Sam thought he was going to leave, about to berate himself for ruining what they had, but then Grizz cupped his cheeks instead. “What we have is complicated, Sam, but I’ve had two weeks to think it over. And I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

“You wouldn’t?” Despite Sam having been desperate for this kind of response, when faced with it… he had no idea what to do.

With a chuckle, Grizz brushed Sam’s cheeks with his thumbs, gazing earnestly down at him. “Not in a million fucking years.” He seemed to get a little bashful then, avoiding Sam’s eyes. “Look, I… I really like you, Sam. And I hope you like me too, because I was thinking that  _ you _ might’ve changed your mind about us, what with Becca and everything-”

“That’s different. I promise,” Sam interrupted, vowing to himself that he’d come clean to Grizz about that situation soon. “You even have to ask if I like you?”

“Oh, okay, I see what you’re doing,” Grizz laughed, leaning down to kiss Sam. And for the first time in a long time, Sam felt like he was at home in Grizz’s arms.


End file.
